4th of July photos

Chance didnt like the big dogs.

Bellula was sweet.

Im just grateful he wanted to come with us.

It has become a new tradition to go to Toms dads home in San Clemente where the weather is beautiful and the air is clean. We go and roast marshmellows, along with my soon-to-be sister in law Dana and her husband Eric. I took Chance along too. I had an opportunity to have a good chat with Steveo regarding bullying. I love that he trusts me enough to tell me about his worries. I hope we always maintain that tight connection.

Nick had a blast too, and spent half the time playing video games and watching Spaceballs. He seems really comfortable around Toms family too. All in All, it was a happy Independence Day.

Sea World

Sea World with the boys was cool. This was Steveos first time there, and Nicks 3rd. It has been a few years since I last went, and they added a cool Cirque De Solei type show. That was my favorite part.

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Steveo got a snake painted on his face.

As Im taking pics of Steveos new face paint, I notice Nick made a new friend. I discretely snapped a picture of her. Apparently, while Nick was sitting on the bench waiting for us, she sat next to him and initiated small talk. Nick is such a cutie and girls were checking him out left and right. He was completely oblivious.

steveo and I play with light

Amazing what you can find in the $1.00 bin at Target.

Dear Nick

I dont know how this happened, but somehow you have transformed into a full blown 14 year old on his way to high school in September. I tried to use our road trip today as a series of teaching moments. Like, when I was driving on the freeway and I almost changed lanes right into a black SUV. I explained to you that its really important to check your blind spot to avoid that kind of a situation, or how I showed you how to pump gas and and swipe a credit card to pay for it. I suddenly feel like I have so much to teach you about driving, handling money, being safe, how to not cave into peer pressure. I just cant keep up. I still remember talking to your dad when you were a baby about how he has more patience and he should be the one to teach you how to drive. He proudly agreed. He looked forward to teaching you to drive a stick, I wish he was here. You both have missed out on so much of each other. You two are more alike than you know.

And so here I am, 14 years later, trying to make up for the loss, trying to do it all as fast as I can because before I kn0w it, you will be graduating, you will have your whole life ahead of you, and whether I want to or not, I will have to let you go to live life on your own, to make mistakes, to learn from mistakes, to make choices and live with them. I have to release you into a scary world and that thought alone keeps me in the now. I cant even focus on that time yet, so I will just celebrate who you are now. I love you and you will always be my Nicolopogus and there isnt anything I wouldnt do or sacrifice for you.

Happy Birthday Nicolopogus

So his birthday fell on Mothers Day this year, so we did the whole birthday/paintball day today instead. This is his 3rd year, and he brought 2 friends along this year instead of one. I cant believe he will be in high school next year. Im so proud of him, he has been getting all A's in his classes except for Language Arts, and this year he has made a lot more friends at school. All I want is to see him happy.

I love you more than anything my little Nicolopogus. ( He made me swear to never call him that in front of his friends)

Steveo and his friends dig the new clubhouse

They were hanging out listening to "Disturbed" and chatting about whatever it is little boys his age chat about!!!!

Not cool Nick!!!!

He had his school nurse worried when she did the routine Scoliosis screenings. I blew it off and told Nick I would call his doctor and make an appointment and he will tell us everything is fine, besides his Aunt Christina was told she had Scoliosis too, and she turned out okay. So we see Nicks doctor. Nicks doctor sends us to get Xrays, I tell Nick not to worry its just to be on the safe side and to confirm no treatment is necessary and we will be fine. 2 weeks later, Desert Orthopedic Center calls to schedule an appointment for Nick, as requested by his Primary Care Doctor (umm hello, shouldn't I have gotten a heads up) We get in today, the specialist brings Nicks Xrays up on the computer, and stares at it, for at least 2 minutes, while me and Nick stare at him staring at the image. He tells Nick he wants a lateral Xray, sends him into the other room, 5 minutes later, pulls it up on the screen and tells me he is referring him to a specialist in Loma Linda. The problem is, his spine is not only very crooked, but he has no arch in his lower back where the tailbone is located, thus nothing to fit a back brace onto, therefore, his conclusion is he needs "surgical intervention". Nick looks over at me while I'm smiling back at him rolling my eyes as if to say, yeah whatever this guy clearly doesn't know what he's talking about. Hoping to settle any fears that may be running through his mind. I grab the CD and he tells us we should be hearing from Loma Linda within 2-3 weeks.

We get in the car. Nicks first question: Mom, can we google how many deaths per year Loma Linda Hospital has during back surgery? I giggle. Oh Nick, don't even go there everything will be fine (as my heart is racing and tears are beginning to well up) I don't want to give him any indication that Im afraid. His 2nd question to me was: Mom, how much school will I be able to miss for this sort of thing? I tell him if he does have to get surgery we will milk it for all we can. So I guess now we wait. I have his xrays and have been doing my research on this sort of thing, to better prepare myself for what might happen. Oh and the doctor said he is probably going to over 6 feet tall:)